The battle lines had been drawn but with every tactical move we made, they had a counter attack, depleting our resources and sending us scurrying for cover. Every compromise, bribe and threat was meet with genetically ingrained stubbornness
We tried negotiations but they had been expecting that and seemed to take great joy in our weaknesses.
We sent in a spy but her nonchalant attitude did little to gain us information or their confidence.
So we found ourselves at an impasse. We stalled and many a tactical discussion left us with more questions than we had answers. We knew that this battle was being fought by many other toddler parents, and we tried to learn from their correspondence but nothing seemed to work.
Until, weary and at a lose, we started to simply ignore them.
We started to ignore the antisocial behaviour.
Ignore the food missiles.
Ignore the upturned bowls.
Ignore the war cry "Yuck!"
Ignore the inevitable mess.
There was a cease fire.
We started giving only moderate praise for their offers of friendship.
Well done with your spoon Mans
Good job Linc
What a big boy
As a show of faith we opened our front line, disposing of their restraining toddler chairs and allowing them to sit in 'big boy' chairs. If they request bigger cutlery, they are obliged. They now feel like they have more control and don't need to make every meal into a war zone.
We have come to an understanding and a kind of peace has settle over meal times. Even if they come to the table armed, we have a plan of attack...
...and that's no attack at all.
Wouldn't it be nice if all wars were that simple to settle?
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